My day ends in troubles, in wakeless time to be ended -
My night begins with sleep, in wakeless time begun -
I walk into the dreamland, that place East of Eden -
That land of Nod remembered, where we fitfully roam.
My time there is trackless, a rootless wanderer, I -
Encountering you others, and seeing what you see -
For you this misty land, offers refuge and respite -
For me it is another land, different yet the same.
As such dreams may come, I experience in wanderings -
Vision clouded, both ahead and behind -
For me this land offers no rest, nor compassion in my sleep -
For you to sleep that sleep, that only the Just may have.
Soon that time ends, and the mists of dreams do fade -
But never to be gone, in my daily waking times -
For dream haunts me still, at the edges of my sight -
A land of promise gone, forbidden to my soul.
And in my days I try, to keep coherence bare -
To keep a point to thoughts, that slip like waters fare -
I drink quickly, and lick my fingers clean -
For the water moves from me, though I do not wish it.
I no longer walk far, in this land of waking -
My life's energy taken, by so few steps -
Often times a difficulty, to stand and hold my place -
As the mists of dream do haunt me, no matter where I face.
A past a firm foundation, my future no longer bright -
The thoughts and plans I made, I work through in my life -
The days are trackless wanderings, though I do not venture far -
My certitude is fading, as the mists of dreams enfold.
I struggle on with this willful soul, and keep the good fight whole -
Each victory is hard won, each defeat a dagger's strike -
As my wake and thoughts and energy, each move to their own time -
I track my life with shallow certainty, the day to have its mark.
Each mark dims as time moves on, and night slips up on me -
As my time for struggle in the day, now moves into the night -
I sleep not whole nor wake fully, yet keep my spirit whole -
My struggle to remain myself, my only certainty.
To you who walk in daylight, look up and bask in warmth -
To those who track the night, and gain surcease from struggle -
Do not look down into the mists, to see my wandering soul -
For the mists shift and move, seeking their fair share.
Time enough for mists, when your time is done -
Time enough for blankness, when the needs for thought is gone -
Live life in joy, no matter how wretched you be -
For you do sleep and dream, and hope for dreams come true.
I live now in the hinterlands, not claimed by either land -
Look equally upon both sleep and dream and sand -
Dreams and nightmares both, hold no power on me -
Save the wakeful dreaming, of those things to come.
Save your pity for those, that enter willingly-
I came by cirucmstance, and fight to make things clear -
Spare me questions of light, and darkness as both I know -
Shift in my dreaming time, which is my life in whole.
I fare you well in your luck, to have mind and body whole -
We both make do, as is our right -
To give meaning, and light -
While you walk in waking, and I am East of Eden.
Forevermore without rest, even while I sleep -
And my troubled day will end, with night to bring an end -
And I will walk in night as in day, seeking meaning and the right -
And smile upon you who sleep, gentle into this good night.
My apologies to all - it doesn't scan, but it is from the heart... written as my hands willed it.
31 January 2006
To sleep... perchance...
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