Some unsolicited advice for the Republican Party

Well, I will say this right up front: I hate Big Government of *both* the Liberal and Conservative varieties and I think you folks really do need to get a clue as to securing the Nation's borders and how to fight wars.

That said, you now have *two* of the most potent weapons ever imagined against the Democratic Party that have ever been thought of. And what is worse is that any attempt by them to *respond* in outrage, just makes things worse for them.

What are they?

Well, the first of these most potent weapons you have already started to get a clue about: Laughter. The ideologically hide-bound Leftist wing of the Democratic party is so damned serious about wanting everything just their way that they complain about everything thrown at them as 'unfair' and 'dishonest' and the only time they can even smile is when they make a derogatory remark against an opponent. They literally cannot respond rationally to being made fun of in a serious manner as seen in the Zucker ads and in the RNC Ford ad. We see much raging and stamping of feet. Much holding of breath. Much denial that what actually took place was what actually took place, and if the record shows that these things did take place, but not in the over-the-top manner shown they just get madder. They spout and steam and vituperate and cannot figure out how to laugh at themselves. I suggest that you help the Nation to learn to laugh AT THEM. They make the Communist Party under Stalin to be a laugh-riot in comparison. That is where they are. They have built a fine bridge to try and span the abyss between what America stands for and what they want it to become. Laugh at the supports they have made and they will find themselves like so many cartoon characters in mid-air after the supports are taken away: in freefall.

One ad a week on POLICY and how the Democrats have screwed it up backwards and forwards for the last 30 years should do it. Zucker and his folks are up to it as they want to have the ADULTS take over the Democratic Party again. If they help you succeed that can happen and then you will have a *real* party to run against. This will take more than two years so you are safe until the next election. In six years this could be real trouble for you if you SUCCEED. That is better than this non-course the Republican Party is currently charting into useless oblivion. Your only way to save the two party system is to make a laughing stock of the far LEFT and allow sensible folks to take over the Democratic Party again.

The other great and potent weapon is: John F. Kerry. I cover his most recent in the meltdown to the election we are currently in.

The man is humorless, stiff and makes cardboard cutouts appear animated in comparison. His disdain for America is so suffused within his character that he positively exudes French. Here is how to distill this material: ensure that operatives are at every rally, every public appearance and generally in the crowd and quiet just recording the wonderful utterances and outlook of John F. Kerry upon America with camcorders when real media don't show up.

Take all of that material.

Hand it to the folks in advertising business like the Zucker folks or the ones that made the Ford ad.

Create an alternate reality where John F. Kerry is President.

See how his ideas work out in the real world.

Hilarity ensues. And, most likely, a death toll beyond imagination on a Global Scale as terrorism spreads so quickly that eyes will water. Get a half-way decent SF writer to do a bit of work for a couple of weeks and the foundations of your new advertising campaign will be set.

Since you have tons of contacts in commercial industry, find a good marketing group on this and then push one spot a week out the door for the next two years.

Some will be better than others, but stick to the basic facts, give an over-the-top look at things or how dreadfully the Kerry Presidency would have been with his wonderful ideas that he never tells anyone and the super-duper-secret plan for everything he has yet to let out because it is of the 'never goes stale' variety and kept hermetically sealed in a Heinz pickle jar in his basement. Throw in his 'Magic Hat' for fun and frivolity whenever he does something truly asinine. Running gags work well.

Week in and week out people will start to look forward to the regular 30 or 60 second Republican spot as it will be better television than most current PROGRAMS. With a bit of sponsorship work and product placement it might even pay for itself. But no matter what the cost the payback will be, in the word of that famous set of ads: PRICELESS.

Free advice for the Democrats available upon request. The concept of 'defenestration' will be involved. Ask your Leftist ideologues about it.